Ellen Degeneres virus: Your IBM suddenly claims
it's a MAC.
Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory out of
your computer.
Titanic virus: Makes your whole computer go down.
Disney virus: Everything in the computer goes
Goofy.
Mike Tyson virus: Quits after one byte
Prozac virus: Screws up your RAM but your
processor doesn't care.
Sharon Stone virus: Makes a huge initial impact,
then you forget it's there.
Lorena Bobbit virus: Turns your hard disk into a
3.5inch floppy.
Tim Allen virus: Appears helpful, only to destroy
your hard drive upon contact.
Woody Allen virus: Bypasses the motherboard and
turns on a daughter card.
Saddam Hussein virus: Won't let you into any of
your programs.
Tonya Harding virus: Turns your .BAT files into
lethal weapons.
George Michaels virus: Runs its course,
occasionally releasing excess data buildup.
Joey Buttafuoco virus: Only attacks minor files.
X-files virus: All your Icons start shape
shifting.
Spice Girl's virus: Has no real function, but
makes a pretty desktop.
Ronald Reagan virus: Saves your data, but forgets
where it is stored
Dr. Jack Kevorkian virus: Searches your hard drive
for old files and deletes them.
Sony Bono virus: Just when you get surfing the
web, a firewall appears out of no where.
Martha Stewart virus: Takes all your files, sorts
them by catagory and folds them into cute little doilies to be displayed on your desktop.
Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive
suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.
AT&T virus: Every 3 minutes it tells you what
great service you are getting
MCI virus: Every 3 minutes it reminds you that
you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus: Terminates and stays
resident. It'll be back.
