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Besides the general camaraderie and fun
times, Inter-Squad competition is a cornerstone of any squad's existence and
purpose. JG300's approach was to jump right into the fire by immediately
taking on two of the most respected and well-organized CFS3 squads: BM357
"Blazing Magnums" and the 46th, "Dirty Rotten Bastards".
While the results were predictable, overall
this was a successful strategy in that it accomplished the following: JG300
became officially "blooded" and members showed that they could work as a team in
a real competition; as a result we as a whole become more accustomed and
experienced; finally, it provided the start for relationships with these and
other excellent squads while also giving our "Wild Sau" group some exposure in
the CFS3 community.
Hopefully the after-action reports below will
give an idea of how much fun these events are...enjoy!
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This is an after-action report from one of
JG300's first squad matches. This one was against the highly skilled members of
the 46th. "Dirty Rotten Bastards", at 100 or 95 percent realism. While JG300
did not win, it was a very fun event and we feel we made a good showing of it
given the difference in experience between the two groups.
(AP) Isle of Guernsey, England
- Once again, this scarred, war-torn island
off the coast of England was the scene of a heated aerial battle between Allied
and Axis squadrons in the ongoing struggle for supremacy of the skies. Sounds of
straining Daimler-Benz and Merlin engines filled the air as Bf109G-10's from the
JG300 'Wild Sau' Gruppe and P51-D Mustangs, expertly piloted by the famed
horsepower jockeys of the 46th. Fighter Squadron, "Dirty Rotten Bastards",
battled feverishly over the course of hours. As the focus of the battle
gradually began to settle over the airfield, smoke, bullets and aircraft debris
filled the skies as the 46th, boldly led by 46th_Irish, drove the out-strategized
(and, witnesses agree, fairly noxious) JG300 swine from the skies, heroically
defending residents of this island along with their haggis, eel pies and
precious sheep. Collateral damage was limited to only the JG300 embedded
photographer on the scene, who was decapitated by one of the many falling
Messerschmidt tail sections, losing any 'screenies' in the process. According to
surviving JG300 pilots, the lost screen shots of the final score were "So ugly,
not even we can bear to look at them.....Cripes, where's the friggin' Band Aids,
LOL!!!". Indeed, the 46th. squadron far and away led the fight, scoring 25 kills
at 100% over the course of the first 1.5-hour long battle. A second battle, to
10 kills at 100%, settled the match firmly in 46th Fighter Squadron's favor.
As the pilots of the 46th feasted afterwards on roasted Wild Sau baby-back ribs
and pork loin, local children playing on the beach, using sheared-off Bf109
wings as surfboards, observed a flight of Messerschmidts passing close by over
the coast, dipping their wings in humble salute to the gallant and quite
sporting members of the 46th. Sight of this surviving flight still caused
momentary unease among the residents of this tiny island, as it is quite clear
that the threat, smell, and fighting spirit of the the greasy JG300 Wild Sau
group still looms large on the horizon.
As of press time, USAAF and RAF encryption experts could neither confirm nor
deny the existence, or meaning, of the phrase "LOL".
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This after-action report refers to our next
action against the 46th, which was an anti-shipping mission. Another good time
was had by all, and it was a partial success in that we did damage the warship
sufficiently to achieve our primary goal. This after-action report is written
by 46th. pilot PBMay who flew on OUR side as a guest, "JG300-Shultz" (LOL!) and
as you'll see his creative writing skills are as great as his skills in the air!
From
46th. PBMay:
Dear Diary...
May 15, 2003
Misstion 46th_76
I was SO sick today. Too sick, in
fact, to even think of flying with the squad on their mission. They were to head
out to the North Sea again as there was a report of a German flight in that area
stalking a US Destroyer. I tried to walk out to the flight line to wish them
luck, but my fever was so high I didn’t even make it outside my tent. So I can’t
tell you a lot about how things went. Hopefully one of them will file an
official report.
I can tell you, however, about the
strangest dream I had while waiting for them to return. I dreamed that instead
of being an American fighter pilot, I was a German pilot - a proud member of the
JG300 squad flying ME-109-10s - and it was our squadron that was sent to sink
the destroyer. We took off from an obscure airfield with hundreds of roughly
filled bomb craters in the runway. The rough surface, heavy bomb load, no tail
lock and torque of the massive engine made it a handful. I was the last person
in the squad to take off, so I also had to deal with the dust on the runway and
wake turbulence once airborne. Fortunately I was a good of German pilot as I was
an American pilot and I made it look easy
We quickly formed up into formation and headed for our target. We passed the
time by joking around and laughing, just like us Yanks do. One even talked about
his newborn son back home whom he hadn’t seen yet. They were really “normal”
guys - friendly even. Normal, that is, except for their names. They all had
strange names --- Exos, Turkey, Sparky, Laughter and ,now get this, Stoopy! What
kind of German names were those? That must have been the fever speaking.
Soon we were over the ships and we started our bomb runs. As I was diving down,
I had a really strange feeling seeing an American Flag flying off the bridge as
I released my bombs. I got a hit, but only on the fantail with no real apparent
damage. My other squad mate made their bomb and rocket passes with varying
success - no direct hits but lots of minor damage type hit. Although the ship
was still floating as we headed for home, she was going to be out of service for
a couple of week repairing the damage we inflicted.
About the time I was leveling off and forming on Stoopy’s 5, a group of P-51Ds
surprised us by diving out of the clouds. There was something very strange about
these flashy painted Mustangs. It was like I knew them, some how, and it just
didn’t seem right to be trying to shoot them down. Although I did manage to get
off some well placed cannon shots, this strange feeling distracted me enough
that I could never quite make myself fully engage them, and that left me
so vulnerable that I was easily shot down by one of them. Even stranger, I had
the distinct feeling that the yank that shot me down was a Irishman with short
legs, an evil laugh and a commanding presence.
It was at this time that a gentle rocking of my shoulders awakened me. I opened
my eyes and saw that warm, smiling face of RandyRaider, freshly back from the
mission, who had stopped by to see how I was doing. I asked him how the mission
went, and he said it was a rough one. That the German pilots they went against
were really sharp, and that one of them did vertical reverses with that same
twist on top like that I invented.
Duncan brought me some chicken soup and now I'm all tuckered out again, so I’m
going to sign off and go back to bed. I hope that this time I’ll dream about
some of RandyRaider’s island girls instead of German pilots and planes.
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This after-action report was written
following another battle with the 46th on 6/13/03. This was a quick mission
followed by a VERY fun team dogfight that had both sides working hard!
Fisherman experience lower
Halibut yields
Grease, "Stank" on
water claimed as reason
English Channel - (AP)
Local fisherman have experienced an almost overnight loss in yields of Halibut,
Sturgeon and Eel due to strange and detrimental ecological phenomenon in the
local area. Preliminary oceanographic studies show the likely causes as habitat
degradation and deteriorating water quality linked to overall pollution of the
area by varied aircraft components and associated fluids.
"We study this area at least once a week ever since the population of Guernsey
noticed an odorous haze over the area" said oceanographer Reginald LeCrispe.
"and along with a large amount of what we have identified as aircraft-grade
hydraulic fluid and other basic petrochemical derivatives, we also see something
unusual....wild boar hair floating on the water".
Local fisherman Elehughe Haggissmythe is of an altogether different opinion:
"They be Wild Saus's I tell ye, arrr!! Thar be a tremendous stank upon the
water, and I seen with me own eyes a buncha flyin' hogs in Jerry planes dartin'
around the skies. 'Twas then that a great mass of white whales..errr..aeroplanes,
came divin' from the heavens, to drive the beasts away. Yet, though the battle
was great, the foulness of them sau's remains to this very day, and shall for
many score I fear."
While the potential economic impact has yet to be ascertained, it has opened up
doors for new catering options to our visiting American pilots, as shown by a
trip to the mess of the 46th. Squad. "Don't like fish. Like to eat cooked hog
meat" said 46th_PBMay, while 46th_Canuck also claimed "Just need beer. More beer
for everyone!!!".
S~ to the brave and intrepid boys of the 46th!!
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